Telephones are Evil

This has always been a common theme for me, but lately, the evil phones have been stalking me. There's a reason (or several) why I do not have a cell phone, most importantly being that my heart rate increases dramatically every time I hear a phone ringing, particularly if I'm the one responsible for picking it up. Fortunately, hardly anyone calls the room phone, plus it has caller ID, so that one is fairly harmless. (Note the fairly. If it were to ring while I was on the top bunk and I thought it might be someone important and therefore rushed down to answer it and in the process slipped or jumped or otherwise injured myself, I would have to change my opinion. But the point is that this post is mainly focused on phones other than the one in my room.)

I finally learned how to transfer calls at work, which means I can pass off responsibility to others, but my favorite method is to merely hand the phone to whoever happens to be standing nearest, even if that is all the way across the main floor. I have also been known to use the phrase, "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the static. Please dial the number you wish to reach yourself." It was true. Why do people always want me to transfer them to the operator anyway?

So yeah, phones in other places have been haunting me. Like a few weeks ago, when I was at the mall, in Boscov's I believe, and we had just stepped off the escalator and all we could hear were multiple phones ringing. And ringing. And ringing. And no one was answering them. Sarah was going to pick it up, just to stop the awful ringing, but since there were multiple phones, it wouldn't have even solved the problem.

And don't even get me started on cell phones. One of the reasons people are so much more isolated today is because everyone is used to being able to use their phone as an excuse. For anything, it seems. "Yeah, I have to sit near the door because if my phone rings, I'll need to leave class." Or, oh yeah, I'm sitting at the lunch table with you, but I'm going to ignore you and make you feel awkward because I need to have this conversation with my male friend. A long conversation. Cell phones make people rude. They are, in fact, an invention of the devil.